by Alex Ortner
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When it comes to eating out or eating with friends, living the raw food lifestyle can be challenging. You plan and prepare your healthy meals every day and then all of the sudden… there is a social event on your calendar. You know that there will be unhealthy food at the event…so what do you do?!
It is possible to enjoy food when you go socialize, it just takes a bit of planning and some willpower. And lets face it…the main idea behind going out is meeting and interacting with friends, not the food itself, right?!
And your “special” diet isn’t as unusual as you may think. Many people these days have allergies and special diets so you will not be that different!
How difficult it becomes for you will depend on how high a percentage of raw food you have in your diet. If you’re a 100% raw foodist, you’ll likely have a much tougher time than somebody who is doing 50% to 80% raw.
Here are 10 tips for stress free socializing on a raw food diet…..
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Tip #1 –If you’re doing the 100% raw food diet (whether it’s a permanent eating habit or you’re just doing a cleanse) it would be advisable to notify your host in advance. Most hosts are more than willing to accommodate and make sure to have food that you can enjoy.
Perhaps offer to bring something to add to the meal or ask if they could make sure there is plenty of salad or raw veggies for you. And worst case, just ask if you can bring your own food because you’d like to make it easier for them.
If you are not 100% raw but rather something in the 50% to 90% range then life is a lot easier. Simply eat raw during the day and leave your ‘allocation’ of cooked food for the event.
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Tip #2 – Eat before you go out so that you are not starving when you get there and tempted to eat something you may regret later. Making healthy decisions is much easier on a full stomach. You’ll find that this alone can help with 90% of the battle.
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Tip #3 – Offer to bring a dessert you have made. Everyone in my experience, enjoys raw desserts, and people do not even consider whether the dish is raw or cooked. It can spark of conversations about healthy eating too! And generally speaking…all of the raw desserts I have ever brought to a party have been the favorite desserts of the night!
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Tip #4 – Decide before you go out what you will eat and what you won’t. For example, decide not to eat dessert, or decide not to combine protein and carbohydrates.
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Tip #5 – If you are choosing to eat fish or meat as part of your cooked percentage then remember to ask if it is grass fed beef or wild fish. If it’s not…I highly recommend avoiding it altogether. Here’s an example of a non-confrontational way to ask…
You: “That beef looks delicious. Where did you get it?”
Them: “I bought it at Big Y, the grocery store just down the street”
You: “It looks great. Is it a special kind of beef like wild fed or organic?”
Them: “I don’t know. I think it’s a regular piece.”
You: “Ok, thanks.”
When you approach the questions with compliments in them you’re able to ask without seeming like you’re insulting them or their food. Once you have the answers you want you can choose to eat it or not to eat it. And remember that any question comes across much better with a smile on your face. ☺
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Tip #6 – Another important thing to ask is what they cooked the food in. Again here you can use the approach of being curious simply because it looks good. When you compliment them they’ll be excited to tell you all about it. Try to avoid foods that are cooked with dairy products. ☺
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Tip #7 – Ask if the party will have a sit down meal or just a buffet. Parties can be a lot easier with the buffet style of eating as it allows you to pick and choose rather than be faced with a meal in front of you that you feel you should eat out of politeness. If it’s going to be sit down, make sure to communicate your eating habits beforehand with the host.
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Tip #8 – If you’re cleansing or eating a very strict raw diet then you’ll want to avoid alcohol, which can be a stumbling block. If you are driving then you have a cast iron excuse not to drink.
One idea is to take something with you like a carafe of a non-alcoholic cocktail you have made yourself which is always a welcome gift. Try freshly squeezed lemon, with puree of raspberries, a few drops of stevia or other plant based sweetener such as coconut palm sugar or agave topped up with sparkling water. Add some mint leaves and put in a large glass jug and it looks amazing!
If there are cocktails just serve yourself some bubbly water in a cocktail glass with a lemon or lime and nobody will know the difference (I’ve used that trick LOTS of times!). ☺
Or stick to plain water and add some lemon to make it more alkaline.
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Tip #9 – Remember to monitor how you’re feeling. Stress plays a big role in our health. If you’re having a lot of trouble with the food then you’re not likely to have fun or be fun to be around. If you’re stressing about the food, go to the bathroom and try something like EFT (tapping) to get your cravings under control, then rejoin the party.
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Tip #10 – Bring a friend. See if there’s a friend who eats like you do who can go with you. Its easier to eat well when you have a peer who’s helping you and making you feel like you’re doing the right thing. It’s easier to succumb to bad eating when you’re the only one that knows it’s not good for you. ☺
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If you have comments or questions on the above or tips you’d like to share with others that you’ve used for staying healthy while socializing please share them below. And if you enjoyed the article please hit the Facebook “Like” button to the right. ☺
To your health,
Alex Ortner
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Great read, this is also useful if you have a profession that includes many lunches and dinners with clients. Thanks!
Excellent suggestions!! Many of which can apply to anyone that is changing any aspect of their diet, whether raw food or just simply cleaning things up! Thanks for sharing such wonderful knowledge!
VERY EXCELLENT points about approaching the host with a smile and a compliment regarding the presentation and with your query!
Most hostesses are stressed maximally about the quality of the food, so helping settle their nerves is a kindness which will always create a win-win situation. You will give them a most precious gift of well-being.
Thanks so much for your wonderful work.
Hi Ronni,
I completely agree. From having seen my wife host many parties for us, I know that a warm smile and compliments about food go a long way.
Thanks for your input.
Alex Ortner
Hey Alex,
Thanks for the tips. I like your suggestions for how to non-confrontational questions about the food.
QUESTION: i see you have 2 small children from the picture. do you feed them 100% raw and what exactly do they eat in a day? My boy (7 years now) has been raw alkaline since he started solids at age 1 (only breast milk till then). It hasn’t been easy and never find many that have done this to speak with. Would love to hear from you.
Best Regards,
Dave
What does EFT stand for? I totally agree with all of your other suggestions. Thank you for the info.
Thanks Alex…such worthwhile tips that I’m sure will make my life much easier when going out.
Thanks so much for this post. I had just such a situation on Christmas. When invited by neighbors to go with them to relatives, I told the husband that I am ‘raw vegan.’ He said that his wife is mostly vegan too and is going to cook some vegan dishes to take along. I said that I could eat cooked on occasion. It was delicious. It was a decision I made to try it out. I have to say that I didn’t feel as well the next few days, but it was what I chose at the time. Plenty of salad and her dish which was quinoa topped with a combo of onions, mushrooms sauted in Olive oil with black eyed peas and purple kale. Really good. I really thing the salt bothered me more than it being cooked. It wasn’t really salty, but I don’t use any added salt to my food. I also am off added oil and a lot of other things. All I am saying with this is that you make your choices/decisions and go from there. If necessary, I would let them know that I would love to come and enjoy their company but I’m going to bring something with me that I can have right now. Is that OK? I Have never had a problem if I let someone know ahead of time. Communication is the key.
Hi Alex, I am noted in your point about eating food that is cooked with dairy. I am interested in your thoughts on raw milk, straight from cows that are grass fed on an organic farm…
I think your tips are great but I find it much simpler for myself to say that due to health reasons (tiny fib…well it is for my health) I am only able to eat certain foods and bring a dish to share that I can eat if nothing else is available and one that everyone will enjoy. Most people are used to people having allergies ect./ sicknesses that they are comfortable with me taking care of my needs. I am tired of having to explain how I get protein and calcium…I am in excellent health without any allergies or illness and I want to stay that way!
Great tips.
Thanks. Friends are not a problem, family is.Specially when all the love they offer is through your plate.They will watch, offer more, comment how you have weakened or worse you have gone crazy, or you are out of your mind not to eat food for which they have put so much of their effort and time.
They will show you how bad they feel if you resist or insist on salads only with the kind of sentences ” How can you do this to me !!!”
Specially if it is your Mom,Who can scold you for weakening her daughter’s (that’s you )well cared body.
You know it is much easier said than done.But still always good to keep trying.
Keep it up. you are doing great, Thanks.
Meenakshi
Great post! I have never been turned down when I ask if I can bring a dish of my own, and I have gotten lots of raves– I’m often referred to as “the lady who makes those delicious kale chips” or whatever… it’s quite gratifying! I also find that taking a huge green salad to a potluck is quite often just the balance that is needed (it’s not the usual “best favourite” that everyone else wants to bring). I love edible flowers in salads but a bug turned up in one little girl’s serving once and that was quite horrifying for her and embarrassing for me (I know, I know– I am trying to move beyond that kind of guilt and shame
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Useful tips indeed. I go raw according to my circumstance. During the week it is quite easy. My husband works night shift and my daughter is happy to eat what I eat and If there is a function at work, I go 50% – 80% raw depending what’s on offer.
But the weekend gets really hard for me. With everyone at home (specially for the evening meals), it’s almost impossible to go raw. I usually go with the flow and not worry too much.
Hi Alex:
I don’t know why a host would be insulted if their guest brought their own special food to an event. When I am hosting where food is involved, and I have a variety of people coming, such as Vegans, Vegetarians, Meat Eaters, Diabetics and other such persons with special food needs, I just love it when they offer to bring their own food and drinks. I also request that they bring enough of the dish and the recipe to share with the other guest. I’ve never been insulted by people not being able to eat what I’ve prepared. In this day and age, it is so hard to please everyone, almost impossible, and a helping hand goes a long way. Besides, it just means more dishes served that I did not have to prepare, and yet get to enjoy something new! Life is Good!
I was wondering if you had additional advice for those that have a child in social situations? We have met with people on both sides where they are very accommodating and those that seem to go out of their way to exclude her. My daughter is 10 and wants to fit in. This diet change is health based and she has been on it for about 3 months. Since it is new to people, they are having a hard time accepting her new diet as an allergy, since it is not an immediate life threatening issue. We try to bring food with us and inform as much as possible.